What really happens at the sex clinic (and the questions you're too embarrassed to ask)
When something feels different, our first thought is to search online for what’s wrong and how to solve it. It may be a light feeling or concern, but after a rigorous search online, that minor symptom begins to feel terrifying, and we’ve no idea if it’s a terminal illness or a blip that will be resolved by tomorrow morning.
Having access to healthcare professionals who are trained, supportive, and want to help you feel comfortable and confident in your body is a wonderful service. It’s a privilege to have someone to turn to when we don’t know what’s going on with our health, particularly when our awareness of our bodies is so poor.
Because of our avoidance of acknowledging when something is wrong or understanding what even to look for in our bodies, we may be preventing ourselves from getting the care we need.
Medical professionals are available to answer the questions you’re too embarrassed to ask your family, but with the trained knowledge and experience to actually share the correct answers. There’s no place quite so essential for our health, yet avoided out of shame and stigma, than a sexual health clinic.
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What exactly is a sex clinic?
On the surface, a sex clinic will do as it states and share information about sexual health. That may be Sexually Transmitted Infection (STI) treatments, contraception resources, or testing the health of different parts of your body.
But they also provide access to a plethora of different services and resources that most people are unaware of smear testing against cervical cancer, vaccines to boost your immunity, consultations on family planning, fertility testing, safe sex guidance, and trusted abortion information.
The services offered at a sex clinic are targeted for everyone, not just one gender or sex. Protecting them and using them when we need is a great way to make sure we’re prioritising awareness of our health rather than turning to unverified information on social media, where 72% of women don’t fact-check the health information they read online.
Services at these sites are making an effort to accommodate all people and tailor their material to be inclusive to trans audiences, creating a space where everyone can share their concerns without feeling afraid.
People who work at sex clinics strive to create welcoming services, where no question is too juvenile or silly to ask. Its work is based on two key principles: making sure that access to appropriate healthcare is accessible for everyone, and that everyone has the right to anonymity to protect their identity, safety, and dignity.
Alex Ho, senior medical advisor at Flo Health, explains: ‘Sexual health clinics (also known as genitourinary medicine or GUM clinics) offer confidential, judgment-free care for all aspects of sexual and reproductive health.
‘Services include STI testing and treatment, contraception, and emergency contraception advice and support for sexual wellbeing and relationships. Many clinics also offer counselling as well as home testing kits. In the UK, services are free under the NHS.’
Before you ignore the symptoms that may indicate you need to seek help at a clinic, understand that the work they do helps your health in ways you may not even be able to recognise yourself.
Medical staff are trained to diagnose you, but there may be indicators of abnormal behaviour that you can recognise in your body. Alex continues: ‘Many STIs are asymptomatic, but possible warning signs include unusual vaginal discharge, pain during sex or urination, itching, sores around the genitals or bleeding between periods’
‘Our Flo Reproductive Health Report 2023 found that more than 1 in 4 UK women don’t fully understand how STIs can be transmitted through oral, vaginal, or anal sex, which shows why regular testing and open conversations about sexual health are so important.’
If you’re still not sure if you’re comfortable with going to an appointment, Gathered has tackled some of the biggest taboos and stigmas that get in the way of our health.
What underwear do I wear to an appointment?
Granny style or thong? Lacy frills or boxer cut? The best pants to wear to an appointment at a sex clinic are the ones that make you feel the most comfortable and confident to take charge of your personal health. Medical professionals don’t care what pants you’re wearing, especially if you end up hiding them in your bag or pocket anyway.
What are the right questions to ask?
If you don’t know something, the best person to ask is a professional. And when clinics and GP surgeries are comprised of people with years of experience, training, and medical knowledge, they house some of the most skilled brains to ask your questions to. And it’s most likely they’ve heard it all before, no matter how silly the question.
If there’s something you’re unsure of or something doesn’t feel right, let them know. It’s safest to be told that you’re completely fine or flag something that doesn’t feel right straight away so that you can be helped as soon as possible.
Understanding what’s normal for your body has never been more crucial, as Alex shares: ‘There are also worrying trends in the UK: despite rising STI cases such as gonorrhoea, spending on STI testing, contraception and treatment has fallen by 17% in recent years. STI awareness has therefore never been more crucial.’
And it’s not just STIs that many people don’t understand, but key facts on menstruation and hormone cycles are often misunderstood as well. Poor health literacy on menstruation is impacting the attainment of girls at school and setting an expectation for women to dismiss their health issues as unimportant.
‘Many women don’t realise how much their menstrual cycle can influence mood and overall wellbeing,’ adds Alex. ‘At Flo, our 2023 Reproductive Health Report found that 34% of women still believe period pain or PMS are ‘just something to put up with.’ By tracking their cycles and symptoms, women can start to recognise patterns, better understand their bodies, and make more informed decisions about their health.’
‘Misinformation continues to be a real issue. Our 2023 Mind the Gaps report showed that 72% of women never verify the health content they read on social media. That’s why every piece of information in Flo is medically reviewed and evidence-based, so women can access accurate guidance they can trust.’
How much or how little is the right amount of talking?
It starts off as a ‘how’s your day going?’ to ease up the tension of someone staring at your genitals, and all of a sudden, you’re spiralling into a conversation about how you miss your first pet and you might eat spag bol for dinner. It’s easy to try and fill the silence to make yourself feel less anxious during a consultation, but there’s no reason to panic.
As long as you’re being respectful, polite, and letting the member of staff do their job, they most likely won’t care if you talk about your love for cheesy pasta and garlic bread.
Will people judge me?
Spoiler alert – the people judging you for being inside a sex clinic are also using the services of a sex clinic themselves. It’s not a waiting room of shame that you’ll be sat in, it’s filled with normal people receiving normal treatments for normal health matters – did we say that using a sex clinic is normal enough yet? Because it is.
‘Some people feel hesitant to visit a sexual health clinic because of stigma or fear of being judged,’ explains Alex. ‘There can still be embarrassment around sexual health even though these clinics are confidential, supportive spaces. Looking after your sexual health is just as important as your physical, or mental wellbeing and getting tested early can protect the long-term health of yourself and others.’
STI awareness has therefore never been more crucial
To shave or not to shave?
That is not the question you should be asking yourself, despite what Hamlet says, before an appointment. Why? Because the person helping you simply doesn’t care. No matter how much or how little pubic hair you may have, it’s likely not the reason you’re having to visit a clinic in the first place.
Can I get contraception?
There’s nothing cheeky about asking for free contraception whilst at a clinic – it is free after all. Have a chat to learn what method works best for you and your partner, and talk to a medical professional about what you’re looking for.
It’s likely they might be able to talk you through how to use something safely, alongside giving you some freebies as a reward for making the trip in the first place.
What if I smell?
Genitals are organs; they’re not eau de parfum. They’re not supposed to smell of fresh florals or tea tree oil; they just behave as they should. You wouldn’t question how your elbow smells, and that’s a part of you that is far more frequently exposed (we hope).
The smell of your genitals changes all the time, for a variety of reasons: when you last had a workout, when you last had sex, if you’re menstruating, if you’re wearing tight-fitting clothes. For example, a vagina can smell metallic during a period because of the iron content in the blood.
Myth-busting ideas that our bodies should look or smell certain ways is the first step for being aware of how our bodies should act when they’re fit and healthy.
Does visiting a clinic mean I’m ill?
Most of the time, the reason you may visit a doctor, nurse, or pharmacist is because you’re experiencing symptoms of something that is disturbing your regular routine.
Although this is undoubtedly a good reason to seek help, routine health checks to confirm that your physical and mental well-being is the best it can be are also great ways to diagnose any underlying health conditions that you may not have had to deal with yet.
Holding yourself accountable and getting routine check-ups is critically important, as Alex explains: ‘A common misconception is that you only need to visit a clinic if something’s wrong.
‘In reality, many STIs don’t cause symptoms, so regular check-ups are simply part of caring for your health. Another taboo is the idea that going to a sexual health clinic is something to be embarrassed about, but it’s actually a positive and responsible step. Getting tested shows care for yourself and your partners and encourages healthy conversations around sexual wellbeing.’
So you want to start prioritising your health…
Flo is the app that can help you navigate your body, whether you’re starting to enter puberty, planning for a family, or your body is experiencing the first signs of menopause.
It’s a safe space for you to track your health and recognise when something abnormal occurs in your body, hosting a chatroom to discuss different concerns and providing a platform for you to find guidance from AI chatbots, tailored to support your everyday health.
‘Flo is the world’s leading women’s health app designed to empower women with accurate, evidence-based insights at every stage of life,’ encourages Alex.
‘Amongst other features, we offer cycle, ovulation, and pregnancy tracking, personalised health content, and tools like symptom tracking and a perimenopause score. Flo’s mission is to help women make informed, confident decisions about their health in a private and secure space.’
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