Forget botox! Here's how to age backwards through just your clothing
Words by Julia Etherington
You’re in midlife but you still feel young and so you want to look young. Yet, are the things we’re told to do to stay ‘with it’ actually helping – or making us look worse?
Here two fashion experts weigh in with their advice on the things we’re doing wrong…and how to get them right.
Wearing trainers with dresses and other Gen Z looks
Long hailed as the ‘cool mum’ look, it is now seen as dated by younger people as stylist Lisa Talbot says: ‘While this look works on Gen Z, on midlife women it can come across as try-hard or unflattering, especially if the dress is floaty or dated. The contrast between the delicate and the clunky can feel mismatched.’
Likewise, Lisa says there’s nothing more forced than trying to emulate Gen Z trends ‘like micro bags, crop tops, overly distressed denim – these can feel forced. Instead, take inspiration from trends and adapt them (e.g. try a cropped jacket with high-waist trousers).’
On footwear, Lisa says: ‘Swap the chunky trainer for a sleek leather trainer or a minimal high-top. Or, for a polished edge, opt for a simple ankle boot or flatform for balance.
Susie Hasler is an award-winning stylist who runs Styled By Susie. She says: ‘For something a little bolder, try a red trainer that will jazz up a basic pair of black trousers. Heels still have a place too – but think block heels or a well-made kitten heel, not sky-high stilettos that leave you limping. And loafers or ballet flats with a bit of structure are great if you want something polished but wearable.’
Avoiding colour (or going too far the other way)
Lisa says: ‘Many women shy away from bright colour, thinking it draws attention to aging skin or is ‘too loud’. Others default to all black to look ‘chic’. But overly muted or dark wardrobes can drain our natural colour, making us look washed out or tired. Too much bold colour worn without thought to skin tone can also overwhelm.’
Susie says: ‘Neutrals can look chic but don’t just stick to neutral or plain clothes because you don’t want to stand out ‘for the wrong reasons’. Neutrals can look elegant but too much can leave you looking washed out, or feeling a bit invisible. Don’t be afraid of brighter colours as they harmonise the skin tone more than black, which can be harsh and draining on some complexions.
If you want to include more colours but in a ‘safe’ way, go for brighter accessories, and add pops of bright pinks, greens or oranges, which can help to lift your complexion. Don’t rule out prints either. A bold pattern can add personality and fun, which isn’t a bad thing at any age.’
Lisa adds: ‘Use colour intentionally. Soft, energising tones near the face like coral, teal, soft navy, or blush can brighten skin and eyes. If you love black, break it up with colour in accessories, neckline, or lipstick. A colour analysis session will help you find your ‘best’ colours to help your skin look light, bright, clear and youthful.’
Too much or too little jewellery
Lisa says: ‘Sticking to small, safe jewellery, often outdated or barely visible because bold feels 'too much' or ‘not age appropriate’. Small or ‘invisible’ jewellery gets lost and adds nothing. On the flip side, overly ‘classic’ sets (like matchy pearls and earrings) can feel dated.’
Susie says: ‘Even a brooch can look contemporary when paired with a heritage print blazer. Bring a pearl necklace up to date by layering with chains of varying lengths. The trick is balance: remember to not put too many statement pieces too close together or they cancel each other out. If you opt for a statement necklace, stick to studs or a small huggie hoop. If opting for statement earrings, go without a necklace or just wear a dainty chain.’
Lisa says: ‘Embrace intentional statement pieces, think modern hoops, bold cuffs, layered necklaces. Choose one standout piece per outfit. It shows personality, confidence, and modern style.’
Choosing comfort over style or vice versa
Do you live in the same pair of safe ballet flats? Or, conversely, do you shove your tired feet into skyscraper heels in an attempt to feel young?
Lisa says: ‘Living in ballet flats or overly practical shoes, or still reaching for heels that we can barely walk in are two extremes that don’t work. Tired, over-worn flats can look frumpy. On the flip side, teetering in high heels can look out of sync with lifestyle and confidence.’
Susie says: ‘As we get older, we do appreciate comfort much more, but that doesn’t mean style needs to be sacrificed. Fortunately, trainers go with every outfit these days. For a trainer that works with all outfits, you can’t go wrong with white.’
Lisa adds: ‘I recommend going for sleek comfy loafers with a chunky sole, pointed flats, block heels, or flatforms. They’re stylish, supportive, and modern.’
Proving you can still fit into clothes from your 30s
We’ve all done it: we’ve kept that favourite fashion piece from our youth to prove we can still fit in it and we’ve still ‘got it.’ In fact some of us even post images of ourselves in that top from 20 years ago. But Lisa says this is a no-no.
‘It’s no good rewearing pieces that used to make us feel good but no longer fit the life or shape we have now e.g. bootcut jeans, long-line cardigans, jersey wrap dresses.
Styles that were once flattering may now feel dated or less structured, especially if our bodies have changed.’
Susie says you can still experiment with fashion at any age, and don’t need to hark back to things that used to look good: ‘One of the biggest mistakes I see is dressing older in an effort to be ‘age appropriate’, and this can actually make you look older.
There’s this myth that once we hit midlife we have to tone everything down – such as wearing longer hemlines, playing it safe when it comes to colours, wearing sensible shoes. But playing it too safe can add years. If you want to colour block, wear animal print or colourful trainers, go for it! Dress for your confidence and inner joy rather than your age.’
Lisa adds: ‘Evolve with your current body and style. Invest in well-cut pieces with a modern silhouette, think a different leg style trousers, a sharp blazer, or elevated knitwear.’
Keeping the same hair and make-up to ‘stay young’
Sometimes clinging on to a look – even if it worked for years – is not a good idea. You may have had luscious long hair all your life but that doesn’t mean you should keep it forever. Likewise, if you’ve always worn it short, that doesn’t mean you should do that into midlife.
Lisa says: ‘Trying to keep long hair the same way you’ve always had it can sometimes drag the face down.’
Make up, too, can get you stuck in a rut. Lisa says: ‘Likewise, heavy foundation or dark lipstick can feel ageing.’
Instead, she advises: ‘Opt for light-reflecting makeup and soft layers around the face. A make-up lesson with a professional who will show you products to suit your skin can be a real added bonus.’
Insta-inspiration
Lacking ideas or not sure how to style your new purchase as a 40 or 50-something? Follow these great Millennial and Gen X Instagram accounts
Charlotte Leaman, mother of two boys, rocks a headband and colourful, everyday outfits with great ideas for layering jewellery and pulling off chunky shoes.
Fashion industry favourite, Alex Stedman worked for a ton of magazines and brands while writing her popular blog The Frugality. She now curates fashion and lifestyle pieces on her socials and Substack, The R.U.E., with a love of stripes, ballet flats and excellent eye wear.
Ex-fashion buyer, now full-time content creator, Emma Paton’s colourful, feel-good outfits are stylish to the max with a breezy, English countryside vibe.
4. @heartzeena
If colour is your passion, Zeena is your girl. This stylist, author, presenter and designer is a master at matching her socks and sandals and brings a luxe London vibe to all her looks.
5. @_winnieq_
Repping for the petite ladies, Winnie Q is an Australian in London with an obsession with hats, volume, comfort and re-wearing.
A platinum bob and a heap of cute outfits makes Jennifer Boddy’s account a great spot for inspiration if you’re a mum who loves fun or have a bit of a festival vibe about your style.
Erica Allen-Kim is a fashion enthusiast and an architecture professor from Toronto who styles the most impeccable everyday outfits with plenty of baseball caps and floaty skirts with pockets.
Erica Davies is a fashion editor, stylist and author whose book Leopard is a Neutral became the ultimate guide to confidence-boosting dressing. She is an expert with pattern and colour.
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